07.29.09 | West Palm Beach: July 16-17

We left Tucson at 5:30 in the morning to drive to Phoenix and rendezvous with tour manager Jim to pick up travel itineraries and back-pats before shuttling to the airport via an awesome guy named Ryan. The trip had gone pretty smoothly but we were fearing the worst when it came to checking bags. The airline had a $15.00 check fee for any bag 50 pounds or less. Two of the three bags slid past that number fine while the third cost us $50.00.

Having breezed past this step we hit the airport security check line which took forever because we had so much random small music gear. Each item was placed in its own bin which became a bit excessive after a while. We backed up the line pretty well but eventually made it through with a few hours to kill. We settled into an eatery and made short work out of chorizo and egg breakfast burritos, which even while eating them seemed like the wrong food choice before getting on a plane. Shortly afterward we chatted up a local guy who we found out was a dubstep producer who was not only really good and what he did but was also a funny guy.

Later we boarded. Shot over to Dallas. Hung around and ate airport McDonalds. As we were consuming, an unmistakable smell of shit hit our noses and the only culprit was a middle-aged flight attendant sitting a few chairs away from us. She didn’t let on it was her but we all knew it was and on top of that that the smell was atrocious to the point of hilarity. It also made me not want to eat anymore. But I did anyway. Yeah.

A few hours later we were in West Palm Beach. We were met at the airport by Patrick and Shawn (If I spelled your name wrong Shawn please let me know). They had no obligation to pick us up and cart us around but they did and we thank them greatly for it. Because we got in a day early we had planned on crashing in the airport until Nachtmahr arrived the next day. Fortunately these two gentlemen wouldn’t stand for that and instead scooped us up and took us to Patrick’s house where we would sleep for the night.

Before going to sleep they took us to Respectable Street to show us where we’d be playing the next day. The theme of the night was Hot Pants and by all means the pants were out in full short force. We drank beer and a few of us went across the street to get sushi at Jack’s Sushi (which apparently is the best sushi anyone who’s ever eaten it has ever had). I opted to stay in Hot Pants night and hung out with DJ Femmina and chatted about music and continued to drink.

Eventually we got back to Patrick’s house and settled in to bed but not before watching the last third of Armageddon on television.

Next morning we were off to the hotel. Soon after check in Nachtmahr arrived and we had a grand reunion. It was great seeing Thomas and Max again and we pretty much picked up right where we left off. Soon we were off to sound check which went nearly flawlessly. At the venue we hung out with Ken from Radio Golgotha and his girlfriend Samantha who proved to be awesome merch booth cohorts throughout the evening.

Our set started off really early at 10:15. The club was open until about 3:30 or so just to give you an idea of what I mean by early. The set went well until about halfway through my Novation synth crapped out on me. We still made it through though. At one point Patrick tore up the cowbell onstage with us and and it was awesome.

When we got off stage we were happy to hear we’d already sold some merch and also found out we had a few different people drive hours to see us but missed our set because we went on so early. We felt pretty bad for them but in the end there wasn’t much we could do about it. Nachtmahr went on around midnight and had control over the crowd the entire time. It was a pretty sweet show to kick things off. Later we returned to the hotel and went swimming until the wee hours. And by that I mean into the morning, not pissing into the pool.

07.27.09 | MOVIE REVIEW: Lovely but Deadly

Lovely but Deadly film review (big time spoilers)
Lovely but Deadly (1981)

“They moved in on her school… but she had some moves of her own! ”

The film opens with some kids partying on a beach. One of them is very stoned. He has been doing a ton of elephant. The other teens (twenty year olds) are jamming pretty hard, having the type of early 1980’s beach awesomeness that exists only in fever dreams. One girl becomes worried when said stoned guy starts acting crazy, especially when he goes for a dip and dies.

Cut to opening credits.

A high-school dance rages to an amazing rock tune that could only exist in this film. Soon we are introduced to a suave tech guy with a video camera who is shooting girls dancing. He is hands down the coolest guy in the movie, and the film does a good job of reversing the tech=dork stereotype generated by so many other 80’s films. He is in mid shot when a real nerd approaches and tells him that a girl wants to meet him. It isn’t just any girl though, it is the worlds most attractive girl, or so the movie leads you to believe.

Tech guy introduces himself and learns her name is Mary Ann Lovette, or Lovely for short. Her agrees she is, then introduces himself as Captain Magic. They retreat to his sweet pad filled with all kinds of cutting edge VHS video technology which looks more like a post- apocalyptic computer bunker than a teen’s room. He keeps calling himself Captain Magic and she oozes with delight. They get cozy and are about to go all the way when she totally tricks him and beats him up because he was dealing drugs. Elephant to be exact. A special kind he pioneers.

At one point she has him in a some sort of movie lock hold and asks him something like, “Do you still want a wild girl” and he replies with the best line of dialog ever written, “I changed my mind, I just want a sweet young thing that’s afraid of me.”.

Anyway she kills him with his special stash of elephant and we learn that the stoned guy in the beginning was her brother who OD’d (although he didn’t because he drowned) and she’s out there to clean up the mess.

Lovely is questioned by police at school but is let off because the officer is really lazy and stupid. Also she is hardly a suspect because she encompasses the She’s All That movie vibe, where she is obviously attractive but in the realm of the film is viewed as dorky and not likely to do anything wrong. At least that’s what they want you to believe for the first few minutes.

Soon there is a barrage of characters that look similar and become hard to identify. One of them is a Preppy Cool Guy (PCG) who wants to be friends with Lovely. She falls for him immediately and brings him home to her aunt’s house where she is living with her aunt and distraught parents. Lovely’s Dad is on crutches and grimaces a lot. He doesn’t approve of Lovely’s new friend because he reminds him of his dead son. When the friend meets Lovely’s Mom, the mother actually thinks that he is her deceased boy then starts crying. It is awkward and seems unwelcoming, but for some reason the friend says he will take her parents to the airport. That he needs to.

Then this other guy shows up at a clubhouse pool, he has dreams, big dreams of becoming a musician. He is basically an early 20’s David Cassidy clone gone awry and wandering in the 80’s. His music is fantastic. Lovely makes out with him in a hot tube for about three minutes screen time.

Back at school things go bad. Lovely wants to kill more drug dealers which invites trouble. Two goons show up to kick some ass. Lovely and Preppy Cool Guy flee their wrath to a nurse’s office, except once they go through the door it is actually a wood-shop class. Lovely demonstrates her fighting skills, then her retreat skills when she goes for some crazy maneuver which only purpose appears to be leaving PCG alone to get double worked by the goons. Eventually she returns to save the day, arriving just a few seconds late but everything is fine. PCD suffers minor injuries including a bloody face and broken arm and a hospital visit.

Anyway, things sort themselves out and Lovely hits up her karate class where all the students wear snow-tiger striped white gui tops and tight black stockings that allow for their underwear to be seen. Her teacher is really good at fighting, but actually is just a student and there appears to be no one teaching the class or any structure to their doings at all.

Lovely hears of a drug dealer named Mantis Managian who is only her schools hottest guy who runs some sort of puppet regime at the campus. She wants to kill him bad so she starts talking to him which pisses off a cheerleader. That cheerleader starts a fight in the locker- room, but not before boobs are seen for no reason. This fight is fantastic. Girls come out of nowhere to stomp Lovely. But luckily Lovely’s gang isn’t far away, they show up and trounce the cheer squad.

Her antics catch Mantis’ attention and he invites her to a swinger party hosted by a guy who looks like a glam-rock Adam West (GRAW) and is constantly talking about how awesome his possessions are. Lovely is in full fake-whore mode and seeking horny drug dealers. A few minutes in she is making out with Mantis because he likes to “sample the goods”. Then Honest Charlie Gilmarten arrives, he is in his 60’s and looks like a Texas millionaire. With him are the two goons that beat up PCG at the school. They see Lovely but must have forgotten their tussle because they just act as scenery.

Lovely finds Mantis’ hidden stash of drugs which is kept out of sight in a giant treasure chest on the floor at the foot of his bed. She steals some of his elephant to prove something later. At the party Lovely sees the cheerleader from the locker-room and the two exchange words then a food fight or more like a fight in food erupts and culminates when Honest Charlie pours chopped liver paste onto them and says “mud wrestling is not as good as this.” Party ends. GRAW is really annoyed because his expensive marble tile floor is a mess so he kicks everyone out. Honest Charlie likes Lovely’s spunk so he invites her to
his sweet mansion the next day.

At the mansion Lovely tries to kill Honest Charlie, then the gig is up and she’s exposed as the drug dealer slayer. She gets captured and is held prisoner at the docks.

David Cassidy guy performs for his former high-school some of his awesome music. The class is way into it.

PCG stumbles across some lame evidence that points to where Lovely is and tells the lazy cop who continues to be lazy and doesn’t check it out.

Honest Charlie thinks Mantis sent Lovely to kill him to take over his business. He dispatches the two goons to pick Mantis up on a school bus and bust him up. They rock him big time then put him into a cardboard box and insert a steam hose and steam him to death, like the drug scum traitor they though he was.

PCG investigates his hunch and finds it to be true. He gets in the lazy cop’s face and shames him into following the lead.

David Cassidy records some tunes in his swank apartment to the adoring eyes of some groupies. Shortly after he goes down to the docks and meets up with GRAW and Honest Charlie, something isn’t right though, why do they know each other? It’s because David Cassidy’s father owns the docks and controls all the drug trafficking in the area. Lovely finds out and gets enraged.

She is about to be killed, but not before one of the goons takes her to another part of a warehouse to have sex with her, when she escapes!

She shimmies down a ladder to a dock where three motor-boats are attached. She jumps in one and is on her way. The goons follow close behind and take one of the other boats. GRAW arrives shortly after and jumps into what should be the last boat except there are still two left for some reason.

A water chase ensues and is quickly halted when Lovely’s boat runs out of gas. It doesn’t mater because the goons and GRAW’s boats collide and explode making them dead.

Back on the docks Honest Charlie runs around with a ton of thugs trying to kill Lovely. Luckily all the girls from her karate class show up (in uniform) and kick the crap out of the horde of bad guys.

Lovely gets back to land and chases down Honest Charlie then picks him up in a dock-crane claw. She lowers him into the water then sets him down on the dock. Now he is defeated. The cops arrive in full-force because lazy cop actually called it in.

Then Lovely confronts David Cassidy who breaks down and cries because the only reason he supported the drug business was to finance his non-lucrative music career.

Then the movie ends. It is a masterpiece.

Mike T-

07.27.09 | Back home.

We got back home Sunday morning at around 8:30am after being up for just about a day straight. Granted those hours aren’t anything new for people who have toured but at the same time it is still draining and can suck. Especially when the feeling of the tour comes to a close and you realize the world you’ve been living in and the people you’ve been around aren’t going to be there in a few hours. It’s a sad and happy thing and each time a tour closes we all feel very strange and melancholic. Anyhow we’re in the adjustment phase right now and it shouldn’t take too long to get back into the swing of things. I’ll be throwing up various memories over the next few days. Mike T-

Also the Word on the Street section is finally going to get an update soon so check it out.

07.14.09 | Free Download - Beating A Dead Horse

Free download with two new and unreleased Alter Der Ruine songs as well as three new remixes of an old favorite. The single contains a smattering of electro-house, industrial, idm and techno that is sure to please picky ears in some for or another.

DOWNLOAD HERE.

Beating A Dead Horse: The Relax And Ride It Single

1: Bleed For Me
2: Relax And Ride It (Mangadrive Remix)
3: Relax And Ride It (Burikusu!!! Remix)
4: Loud And Sassy
5: Relax And Ride It (Be My Enemy Remix)